*Dedicated to Bri M & Tyler F

If your doctor tells you that the 1/3 of patients don’t make it out alive, you start to think about many aspects of life in general. Also, while in those critical moments, you start to have an intimate conversation with yourself about your death and the life you lived. While not everyone is the same, I would like to share my experiences to let others know what I felt and what I was thinking in those potential final moments of my life.

Years ago, a black man was choked to death by a white police officer in Minnesota. That event was the catalyst of nationwide riot by angry mob of people. I was also furious after watching a man being choked for 8 minutes plus for no good reason. Then, I was having a conversation about it with a white friend. His view on that event was different than mine because I was not able to see it from another angle. My white friend said that it was not solely motivated by racism because it was a police officer who had been interacting and handling criminals of all sorts and races out on the street everyday. And when a police officer, white or black, constantly watches and handles violent criminals or crimes, his judgement would be influenced and he is psychologically damaged naturally by what he sees everyday as a police officer.

The choking incident in Minnesota was not the first time. There were a plenty of incidents in the past such as Rodney King and many others who might not show up in news. We came a long way in North America and other parts of this world, but racism will always be there no matter what due to cultural differences and years of human history. We condemn stereotyping in our society, but you can’t deny that there are some truths to stereotypes such as black people most likely running faster and jumping higher than Asian people. Whatever the case may be, you can’t be easily offended by some words and immediately react recklessly in life because GZA of Wu-Tang Clan told us once about living in the cold world today where cash rules everything around us.

Speaking of running faster, a black teenager in Texas stabbed and killed a white kid at a trackmeet. The black kid was sentenced for 30+ years and the black people in that community were angry. I believe I heard them saying this white kid was a domestic terrorist and racism played a part. Here is the thing. Without getting into how it all happened, if that black kid was wearing a New York Knicks jersey and the white kid started to beat his ass out of nowhere, there wouldn’t have any problem if the black kid stabbed and killed the white kid. That was definitely not the case. If a white person wearing a San Antonio Spurs jersey can take a beating and not stab and kill those who whooped his ass, a black kid should be able to handle a shove without stabbing and killing somebody. Moreover, if this black kid paid attention in school classes, he would’ve have known where not to stab and kill someone. Even if that black kid is generally a good person who made the biggest mistake in his life, it is too late to be crying about spilled milk. This could be the classic example of the epic failure in our education system and parenting.

In early school years in North America, I was blessed to be around students whose families came from all over the world. By opening my mind to other cultures, I was able to learn and understand better about others from different cultures. That eventually allowed me to be able to interact or talk easily to anybody from anywhere years later in the business world. While this world is arguing and fighting each other over racism or whatever, I came to a conclusion that there are all kinds of assholes, backstabbers, scammers and others regardless of skin colors. And when you surround yourself with the wrong people in your life, you will never be able to reach your full potential. In the worst case scenario, you might end up dead without even fully enjoying and living your life. Having a close call myself, I truly realized how important it is to really live my life and also how critical it is to surround myself with the right people in my circle of life and business.

With all that being said, I would like to share this important story for high school or college students about racism, drugs and wasting your time and life with the wrong crowd or losers in life. This tale is based on a true story about a man who goes by the name of Ghetto Superstar aka GS who was wrongfully beaten up for his skin color by two white police officers and years later almost lost his life and pretty much everything else by hanging out and wasting time with the wrong crowd from his early school days.

• Nuthin’ But A G Thang

It was New Year’s Eve in Montreal. GS and RJ was out in the club for the countdown. After hours of drinking and partying, they decided to go back to the hotel about an hour after the countdown. They found a cab and asked the driver to take them back to the hotel. They both weren’t really paying attention where the cab was going. They were somewhat half passed out. Once the cab stopped, the driver told GS and RJ that they arrived at their destination. When they got out of the cab, they realized they were not back at their hotel. Instead, the cab driver drove them to the casino. They were initially upset because they were drunk and tired. Then RJ said,

“Well, f**k it. We are already here anyway. Let’s gamble!”

They entered the casino and wandered around for a minute trying to find the restroom and table games. They both found different Blackjack tables. GS was not a Blackjack player and that was his mistake. Since he didn’t really know how to play Blackjack, it didn’t take long to lose his gambling money to the casino. While GS was losing all of his chips slowly, RJ was at another table and he was doing well. He ended up paying the trip for free by winning at the Blackjack table. That night, just by watching from the sideline, GS learned how to play Blackjack from RJ.

Throughout the years, GS and RJ participated in many local gambling excursions together. They would play and also watch old Asian guys chirping, talking smack, gambling and losing their minds in local casinos. Whenever there was No Limit Texas Hold’em happening in someone’s house, GS and RJ were usually there to win some money for a haircut and some meals. Battirass Entertainment aka BRE was the person who usually provided a place to play some cards. It was the same usual suspects playing no limit for countless hours. While the competition was amateur hours at best, but every game was brutal and there were countless bloodbath full of devastations.

One day GS was invited by Shinobi to play in a mini No Limit Hold’em tournament in an abandoned office space with complete strangers. Shinobi didn’t participate because he was never a gambler. He was just helping somebody out with organizing the mini tournament. This tournament was about 3 tables of players deep from all around the city. For GS, it was much easier to play against complete strangers than the usual suspects because nobody at the tournament was familiar with his game. It wasn’t an easy task to win though since this wasn’t playing with a bunch of drunk tourists.

During the tournament, there was one crucial call that changed the tide of the game for GS. Without that call, there was no way GS could’ve won the tournament. GS had a top pair of kings and his opponent reraised and dumped all his chips on the river. There was a sign of trapping or chasing from the opponent, but GS ultimately made the call to see the cards. The opponent had nothing. Not even a face card. It was a complete bluff. After taking down the opponent with a massive pot, GS became the chip leader and never looked back until the end. That tournament experience has taught GS valuable lessons and insights that he would’ve never learn by playing with the usual suspects from around the way.

• Make Them Remember

After returning from Hawaii for a mini vacation, GS found out that the ownership group of the company he worked for about a year or two decided to sell the company to another group of investors.

• Street Dreams

It was 8 in the morning, GS finally got back to the apartment after being up without any sleep for at least 48 hours straight. GS was only staying at this apartment temporarily due to an unexpected layoff with no real source of income. He was renting a room from a guy who he spent a big chunk of time together in high school hanging out and being up to no good. It was a small room in a basement apartment with stuffs all over the space, but it took no time for GS to fall asleep. He was completely knocked out.

All of a sudden, his roommate, Tyrion, walked in the room and started to wake up GS by calling his name and shaking his shoulder.

“GS, I need you to drive me to work because I’m really late right now.”

GS felt his eyes somewhat burning up with fatigue. He was in a very hazy mind state. He looked at the clock to see what time it was. It was 8:10 AM. GS was extremely upset inside that he was woken up after 10 minutes of sleep. And becasue Tyrion was somewhat helping out GS by renting a room out, he didn’t really express his anger and say anything about the situation. GS decided to go along as usual and drive Tyrion to his work that morning.

Without much sleep after being up at least 48 hours straight, it was a daunting task for GS to concentrate and drive Tyrion to his work. On the way to Tyrion’s workplace, he started to giggle or laugh out loud and said,

“Your car is like a girl’s car. You are driving a car that girls drive.”

GS didn’t say a word. He was silent and just focused on the road. At that moment, GS knew this roommate arrangement was coming to an end earlier than expected no matter what his situation was. If Tyrion was smart enough to renew his license and registration on time, GS wouldn’t have to drive Tyrion all over the place. And Tyrion was too lazy to take the test again to get his license back. GS didn’t say anything about that to Tyrion. When they finally arrived to Tyrion’s workplace, Tyrion said,

“I need you to pick me up after work.”

When GS was not at the apartment listening to Tyrion’s bullshit complaints about nothing, he was out on the street peddling drugs with 3 other dope peddlers who he knew from school days. That was the reason why GS was up at least 2 days straight in order to serve fiends one after another. Dope peddling was definitely not in GS’s bingo card, but sudden betrayal and layoff from his job left him with limited options when he didn’t have money to eat for the week.

• Duck Seazon

GS got a phone call from Cheese one day. Cheese asked GS to meet him at a restaurant bar to hang out for a bit. GS didn’t think much of it and he went out to meet up with Cheese. In the restaurant bar, they were having a couple of beers and just killing time. After 30 minutes of sitting and hanging out at the bar, GS decided to walk out and have a smoke. When he turned around his shoulder to get out of his seat and walk out, there was a man standing close right behind him. GS looked at the man who was standing behind him and recognized it was OB from back in the days. Before GS even had a chance to give pounds or say anything, OB looked at GS. Then, he looked at Cheese with a grin. Right after that, OB threw a nice straight punch on Cheese’s face, knocking him down to the bar table while sitting on a stool. And without saying anything, OB walked out the bar and he was gone.

GS was somewhat surprised because he had no clue what was going on. GS was feeling the vibe of disappointment from Cheese because GS didn’t jump in the action and back him up in a fight. Unfortunately for Cheese, he called the wrong person to have his back during his ducking season because GS wasn’t going to involve in OB’s business without knowing all the details. What Cheese didn’t know was that GS and OB had a mutual respect for a long time. GS asked Cheese about the reason for OB punching his face. Cheese said he was a part of home invasion on OB’s family home years ago and that was the reason why he got punched in the face. So basically that night, Cheese was set up by somebody he was doing his drug deals with at the bar. And he called GS thinking that GS would have his back if something went wrong.

There was no way GS was going to get involved in that situation. Cheese was lucky that it only ended with a nice hard punch by OB. If it was somebody else, that punch could’ve been bullets instead. Once OB realized that Cheese was just nothing but a wanksta, he had to punish Cheese for his past sins.

• Make Them Pay

There was no running away from the obstacles in front of GS. No matter how much his future looked uncertain, he had to keep his composure to focus on his life and keep it moving. While GS was out in the city one day, he saw that his previous employer had a new competition invading their turf. Once GS found out that his previous employer who backstabbed and abandoned him was in some kind of trouble, he wanted to figure out what was happening with the company. After some digging & asking around, GS realized that his previous employer shit the bed & f**ked up again even after using GS to avoid multiple or a class action lawsuit from small business owners. It wasn’t surprising at all to GS since he already had a first hand experience dealing with these second generation Chinese & Arab owners. They pretty much had no choice but to merge with another company in order to avoid completely losing everything.

Once GS found out about the situation, he immediately put his plan in motion. There were 4 companies fighting each other over territories for the same business. One was my previous employer who merged with another company owned by Koreans in the same space. Another one was a company with a large war chest invading the turf of my previous employer. Then there was one company which was borderline a small start up trying to stay in business. GS approached the small start up company with a random email. He told the company owner that GS was the person who they needed in order to compete with others.

A couple of days later, the small company owner replied and asked GS for an interview. After working 8 hours from his job, he walked into the company office for an interview with flip-flops, sweatpants and a dirty t shirt. Everybody in the office looked at GS with a look of “What is this bum looking Asian guy doing here?” GS didn’t have enough time to take a shower and change after 8 hours of physical labor. Also, he didn’t really care what they thought since the company was having a hard time trying to compete with others for years. The company owner looked at GS like he made a mistake for having an interview with a random Asian guy walking around the office with flip-flops. GS didn’t know at that time, but the company owner was facing a serious problem that could really hurt the company. With that in mind, the company owner had nothing to lose and reluctantly hired GS to go up against other competitors.

• Party Ain’t A Party

After RJ’s funeral, his close friends who he spent most of his time with for various reasons decided to organize a charity to raise money and donate proceeds to help students with university tuitions. They would throw a party in venues and collect money from the door, alcohols and etc. GS was never around when this was happening, but he heard about it. Since there was a clear distance and fractured friendship between GS and others, he didn’t even care to be a part of it. They used RJ’s name to throw these parties because RJ was somewhat a life of the party in his social circle.

Whether anybody agrees or not, they couldn’t officially call it “RJ’s party” without GS’s actual presence at the party. When it came to house parties and clubs, GS and RJ were like PB & jelly or rice and curry. While RJ spent more time with others in many different social gatherings and events, he would always want GS to roll with him to house parties and clubs. So GS made a decision to show up at one of these RJ’s charity party to make it an official because without GS at that party, they shouldn’t call it RJ’s party.

Without a proper invitation, GS pulled up to the party unannounced with another associate around the way. The party was jumping for sure. As soon as GS entered the door, he saw all kinds of people dancing, socializing and having fun what not. Immediately upon encountering RJ’s close friends, GS felt an unwelcome vibe and they made it feel like he was not allowed at the party. Many white boys and girls suddenly got Asian eyes like they smoked some good shit and looked at GS with screwed faces. Exception of Divac and Iranian Terrorist’s brother, it looked like they all had an issue with GS being at the party. It was not like GS was there to sell some kind of pyramid or ponzi scams to people, but they didn’t care at all since there was a strong sense of loyalty and alliance between these guys and Tyrion.

GS was not there to bury the hatchet or rebuild any kind of relationship with Tyrion and anybody who rolled with Tyrion. Even before RJ’s death, GS made a decision to stay away from anybody who was rolling with those who he didn’t trust or caused problems. While the party was cool, but GS realized that Tyrion pretty much brainwashed people with his bs story. And GS told himself that it was the last time he would be at RJ’s party that night. At the same time, GS was also curious to find out why BRE was not at RJ’s party when pretty much anyone who knew RJ closely was there.

GS finally found some time and met up with BRE to talk about what was happening in RJ’s life when GS vanished from the picture. It was a sad story to say the least. After being screwed over from his fitness business partner, RJ felt extremely weak and awkward one day. When he finally visited the hospital, he was diagnosed with a cancer. During this time, BRE was the only one who visited RJ in the hospital every week to see how he was doing. While other guys such as Tyrion and Iranian Terrorist spent more time with RJ in social gatherings and parties, they hardly ever visited RJ in the hospital. After many treatments, the doctor told RJ that his cancer was finally gone. So with that news, RJ took a trip to somewhere in Caribbean with others to celebrate for beating his cancer. When he returned from the trip, his cancer also returned with a vengeance and RJ no longer wanted to fight again with pretty much nobody by his side.

Initially, GS thought BRE was lying and making up a story. GS couldn’t belive that Tyrion, Iranian Terrorists, Divac and others hardly ever visited RJ in the hospital. Then BRE said,

“RJ told me. He said he was extremely devastated that none of his friends who he shared decades of memories together in parties and clubs hardly ever visited him. I had to talk to these guys about it. They all had excuses like how they didn’t want to see their best friend in the hospital looking like that.”

GS immediately felt bad about the whole situation after that. However, GS had to respect RJ’s decision to roll with his diaper buddy Tyrion. RJ had a choice to make a phone call to GS and find out what really happened between GS and Tyrion, but instead, he opted not to call and just believed whatever was coming out of Tyrion’s mouth. RJ was devastated that his diaper buddy hardly ever visited him in the hospital, but that was the price he had to pay for riding and dying with Tyrion. And because of that false loyalty that RJ had, GS never got a chance to ask him,

“Is your homeboys hardly ever visiting you in the hospital more devastating than your pocket aces or kings getting cracked on the river with all your chips in?”

In the end, no matter how much time who RJ spent with, he really only had 3 or 4 solid friends out of countless people he spent time with. BRE, someone who played Texas No Limit with and also visited him in the hospital every week. Kukoc who paid for RJ’s funeral. And GS who was always there to make him laugh and have his back in fights at parties and clubs. After a year or two later, GS met up with Divac to catch up and give him a housewarming gift. Out of curiosity, GS asked about RJ’s party and how the charity was going. Funny enough, GS found out that somebody was embezzling money out of the charity for personal gain and the operation had to be shut down. GS laughed so hard inside after hearing about the charity and embezzlement. He couldn’t believe how some people could go so low. Using dead friend or person’s name to raise and steal money was something that GS would never do.

• Still A G Thang